hello world part 5

As the nurses prepare the pitocin drip, i looked at Q feeling helpless. I knew i can do it. On the next contraction, i said i wanted to try again to which they allowed us to try on our own as they insert the drip. We tried.... but still no progress. Due to my movements, the needle for the drip did not go through the vein. They can't find the next vein, so they need to try on my right hand. All of that takes time and it mean longer duration for my baby to be in that position. Each moment pass, i fear for her safety.

The drip was in, and we waited for the next contraction. Seriously, i don't think it had any effect as i felt the same. But i still try and try. At one point, the nurses was saying something, making a joke that i had forgotten.. and i laughed. She then said...' eh boleh gelak lagi..ok lagi nih.' At one point she asked Q to go and get minyak selusuh that mak prepared for me to help on the process. At the verge of giving up, i asked... 'how about vacuum?' To which they replied that it is the next option and Dr. Rohayu is on the way.

While waiting, i whisper to Q.. ' kesian kat baby... dia ok ke kat situ..' Well she is indeed a strong girl as everytime her heartbeat got checked, it is pounding hard. Few minutes later Dr Rohayu arrived and she said. 'Ok, kita cuba 2 kali, kalau tak boleh baru kita vakum. Sayang sangat....sikit lagi je ni' So i tried, but without success.

And finally, Dr Rohayu hold the vacuum in her hand and said 'ok.we do this together. Dr tolong and u do ur best, at the next contraction, u tell me'. As i feel it coming, we counted, 1,2,3.... pushhhhhh. I pushed all i can, although i can feel the pain getting less but i still push and push. The two nurses was cheering like they are watching a football game, looking at my 'down there' waiting for goaaaal...and cheering 'Bagus! Pandai! Lagi! Sikit lagi! '

And finally at 2.17am, baby head was out. From my position i can see it and it felt surreal. I was about to relax when Dr asked to push again to get the rest of the body out. The second she was out Dr held her to me and said 'tengok..anak ape ni' i was blank for a while, then i look at what Dr was showing and i said.. 'perempuan'.  Dr then placed her down and she cry and cry her heart out. The most magical moment.

Next, was extracting out her placenta and stitching. I actually got shocked when Dr said she need to stitch. I asked 'Dr ada potong ke?' 'Ada...kamu tak rasa?' No.. i did not feel anything. Nurses injected what i think is anesthetic and Dr began stitching. No, i did not feel any pain buti can feel the thread going in and out my skin. I just ignored it and turn left to look at my baby. A gift from Allah. Subhanallah. Alhamdulillah.

Once done, we say our thanks and Dr Rohayu left the room. Once she is out, one of the nurse said 'nasib Dr Rohayu... kalo Dr Rosita,.... kena marah dah tadi'. I know Dr Rosita is much stricter. Hehe.  As i got wheeled out of labor room, i can feel my belly is now empty and i immediately feel a strong hungry feeling.

I then drank milo, puke it out due to empty stomach, feed my baby and got allergic reaction mysteriously. It's a long night and we are now officially Umi and Papa. :-)

hello world part 4

I wanted so much to go to labor room so that i can be assured what i felt was contraction. Since no machine was present, i had to rely to the nurse to confirm for me. The pain increases as time past by. For me, the pain revolve around the cervix area. None felt at waist, stomach, backbone or any area. Hence, the confusion. I dont remember how painful it is now, but i remembered tossing and turning left and right while reciting ' la ila haila anta subha na ka inni kuntum minazzolimin...'Everytime the nurse did vaginal inspection and i cringe, she will say sorry but i always tell her it's not painfull as the most pain i felt is the contraction. Other then that is considered not painful. Not even episiotomy or the stitches. So, thats the best way i can describe for the contraction pain.

Everytime i turn to my right or left side, it got more painful, i will call to the nurse... 'rasa nak berakkkk' and she will come to inspect and said its not yet 10cm. At one point, she got doubtful and asked me ' betul ke nak berak?' Huhuhuhu

Finally after what felt like f0rever, it was 8cm.. and she asked me ' nak saya tolong bagi cepat?' Mesti la nakkk... i nodded. Then it was 9cm and 10cm came shortly after. She teached me how to push,i practised and then i can push on the next contraction. There were 2 nurses, 1 at the front and 1 on my left. Q on my right.  i did not hold Q's hand but asked him to hold my head instead. During the pushing,i had to lift my body and touch my chin at the chest which  i was afraid i wont be able to do so.

1st pushed, fail. 2nd push, fail. 3rd push, failllll... arghhh.. sorry baby mommy is such a looser. I dont remember at what push finally baby's hair is visible. They called Q to see and he got teary. Thehee... after that, i pushed for almost 1hr, but no further progress. I dont know why, but suddenly the contraction is not so painful anymore. It is so shortlived that pushing is useless. According to the nurse, u need to feel the pain to facilitate the progress. She keep asking me, do u feel the pain? To which i reply no. Then she said we can't let the baby be in that condition for long as she can't get oxygen there. But i am not faking it, i really do not feel any pain. So, they decidednto drip me. A method to induce pain. And i said OK. Whatever pain i need to take to take my baby out, i'll do it.